Italy

I will be embarking on one of the biggest journeys of my life so far in less than two days. I am blessed with the opportunity to go to Italy for a study abroad program. I will be going for three weeks with 20 people who were strangers, some still are, only weeks ago. I am looking forward to what God is going to do over then next three weeks. I am challenged already to Trust in Him completely not only with nursing school applications, living situations for next year in chico, and what is going to happen next. I know that within these next few days I will be challenged more than I ever thought I would be. Challenged spiritually, emotionally, physically, and relationally. I have noticed all of the close friends I have who care enough to call me and talk before I leave, who want to get together with me and who send messages of all kinds before thursday night. When the clock strikes 3 I will be driving to the sacramento airport, saying goodbye to my family, loading a plane and flying half way across the world. Amazing. I am so excited. We will be spending the first week in Rome... we are learning conversational italian and humanities of the italian culture. 6 units within three weeks, any student knows that's crazy and by the way try to enjoy the scenery at the same time. Life is beautiful, fun, overly enjoyable, hard, challenging, and so worth every heartache, pain, struggle, discontentment and difficult decision. I will over the next few weeks try to post a few pictures of Italy and comment about the journey so far. So to those who do read you will be updated on the latest with my life through this site. Desire every day to be desired, love everyday because you are loved, be happy with the life that you are blessed with, and fulfill your dreams because no one else will do it for you.

Ironman

I just saw Ironman and I am stoked! It was such an amazing movie. I definitely enjoyed it. I encourage you all to see it! I saw it with my two of my favorite people in the world...My sister and bro-in-law. I didn't realize how much I missed them until I spent more than five minutes with them. i am so blessed to have siblings that really care about me and everything that I am involved in. they know what to ask, how to push my buttons, what makes me happy, they know my expressions without saying a word. I am grateful. Go see the movie if you haven't yet.

When? Where? What? Why? Who?

When will I hear from the nursing schools? Where willI be next semester? What should I be doing? Why do I feel pressure from society to know my schedule? Who truly cares when I hear, where I go, what I will be doing? I don't know any of these answers but I do know the tone of voice that comforts me when I have all of these feelings, thoughts, desires, and curiousities. I am trying with all of my being to trust fully in God for these answers and i know that I only will get these answers by waiting, patiently. I am not worthless. I am not a failure just because I haven't been accepted. Trust! I will trust. Even when I am still confused I will know that I can trust in Him and see the outcome in the future looking back and worshipping and thanking God for his hand in my life.

Speechless!

I think that we tend to put God in a box... We act like we don't need His help, like we know what is best for our lives, and we tend to only cling to Him in our times of struggle. Today, I was in amazement of who God is, not like an everyday amazement that I get, but an overwhelming, tears of joy and love, chills all over my body amazement. I can't even imagine standing face-to-face with Jesus. Just feeling his presences is unbearable, I find myself humbled, overjoyed, and real. God is showing me how to trust in Him and how to spend precious time with Him, blocking out all of the noise and distractions. Even though we may not know where the road is traveling if we just look up and not worry about the next step we will find ourselves in love with the creator, awestruck by His beauty and captivated in His character. "Look Up! Don't Worry!" says the Lord in my heart. "Trust!"

What is this feeling?

I have this feeling that I can not describe. Tears run down my face, submission seems necessary but what to? I am content with my life, really I am, even in the valley. I know that nursing school is somewhere in the future just don't know when or where. I know that if I can just continue to trust in God that it will all work for the good. But still, I am human...I have pain, disappointment, loneliness, happiness, joy, comfort. I find myself driving to chico and acting like Christ is sitting in my passenger seat... that leads to tears as I unload all that I am going through, anger, disappointment, curiosity of the future, which leads to submission, joy and belting out worship music with a stuffy nose, red eyes, and the most love, grace and mercy I could ever imagine. This happened today. Finding myself in the mist of God and not caring what lies around me. 

The Power of Prayer

Prayer... When life gets to hard to stand... kneel. This quote is carrying me through this night. My heart is breaking in pain and agony. Someone so close to me is experiencing pain that is unbearable. Prayer is the only answer, kneeling is the only position that seems  reverent. Emotions invade my innermost being. Vocal prayer is wanted to comfort her, tears run down my face as I mourn for her discomfort. Night after night and still no sleep seems unfair for someone already bearing so much. Thank you God for the grace and mercy that you continue to give us. Prayer is were I will remain. God is Good all the time even in the middle of the night. 

Technology Runs Life?

Has our modern technology become our everything? I was blessed to not have a phone for 24 hours not by choice but in the end it has influenced me greatly. Not having a phone made me realize how dependent we(most) are on our cell phones. My friends numbers are in there, my way of communication is there, my way to tell time is there, and most of all time wasted is there. I have realized that yes cell phones are great to keep in contact with people that you can't see everyday or so often but truly we butcher that and tweak it to become our email, scheduler, internet-on-the-go and  a necessity to have. But I am blessed to have such a wonderful thing. I can keep in contact with friends far away and that is such a blessing. And if I control the phone and not let it control me, which for some random reason I feel bad not answering a phone call, our perspective about life might change. It may become more personal in the reality of life, instead of hiding behind the phone to have a conversation. It's physical interaction with conversation that leads to a closer friendship. Check your viewpoint? Where Your time is spent?

New Friendships

New Friendships bite you in the rear sometimes when you least expect it. You could just be going about your normal everyday life and the next thing you know you are having Aca taco with a young lady at Teaz Me. The next thing that you know is that you want to tell your new friend about your life from your childhood to the present and everything in between. But every new friendship is tested.... you either can pass the test and become friends or you can show your true colors and not make the cut. Well traveling passes the test with flying colors. I was blessed to be able to travel to colorado to meet Daylene and share with her personal details of my life and water the seed that had been planted at Teaz Me. Thank God for communication advances for us to communicate. When Daylene came out to California I was so excited to spend more time with her. From the Bidwell Park to late night comversations, our friendship has began to grow. I am so blessed to know Daylene. To get the opportunity to have a friendship that is true and centered in Christ is rare. I had a blast with her and I look forward to the next visit whether California or Colorado here I come!

Fondue with Don and Jo

Tonight I had Don and Jo over for fondue. It was the best unique dinner I have had in a while at my house. I haven't gotten the chance to cook this semester but Fondue is definitely one of my favorite things to eat with company. The conversation was full of God and the mighty things that are happening in my life and theirs in return. They are amazing people and I am so blessed to know them. 

Menu: Top Sirloin Steak, 

potatoes, squash, 

mushrooms, bread 

and gorgonzola cheese.

Dessert: strawberries,

bananas, and rice krispies 

in chocolate.... YUM!

Falling in love with this amazing man!

Ever since moving to Chico, my life has changed dramatically. I have fallen in love with this amazing man who continues everyday to captivate me. He is what every woman desires. Who every man should want to be. in the park He takes my breathe away, in the darkness its His voice that I cling to, when i am joyful it is because of Him. I can not and want not to flee from His presence. Without Him my life is nothing. With Him I have life. I find joy in life because of Him. I love to sit and just have "coffee" time with Him. Have you seen his creation? It blows me away. Have you seen the world from His eyes? I know that he thinks that i am beautiful, that He wants me only for himself, that He pursues me constantly every hour. I am in love with Christ!!!!! I am moved by the holy spirit and what He is doing in our lives. I got to be in these blossom orchards and I was speechless. Nothing else mattered to me. 

My first Blog

I am creating a blog to keep some of my friends up to date on my life and hopefully to encourage those who see my blog to fall deeper in LOVE with Christ. I have crazy things that have happened in the last few months to me and my family. Not only has my mother been diagnosed with Breast Cancer she has become the heroine in my life that I have never had before now. She is someone who i hope to be exactly alike. She loves the Lord, cares for her family, will do whatever it takes to make sure that we are depending on God and challenging us along the way. I admire her more than I have any other woman.