TIA: This is Africa

• Traffic control is non-existent, driving on the side walks and on the other side of the road whenever you choose.
• Carrying some rubbish on the back of a Zimmy
• Four people on a two-seater Zimmy. (Motor bike)
• Babies only strapped to their mother on the back of a moving vehicle asleep
• A fishing boat: instead of fixing the hole in the bottom of the boat they just use a bucket to remove the water.
• A woman carrying a Bucket of Water on her head while scurrying across a busy intersection… not spilling one drop
• Living with an inch deep of water on the floor of your house.
• Toddlers working on the side of the street with their parents.
• Where a 3 years old isn’t screaming their head off because they got the wrong toy, or because they didn’t get something that they wanted
• Hearing "Yovo, Yovo" while walking down the street. (meaning white person, white person)
• The President of the Country just happens to show up at a sports arena.
• A trail of goats walking on the side of the road following their master.
• Gasoline being sold by a ten year old on the side of the road from a jar
• Painting toes means the world to a little girl.
• Two grown men holding hands to show brotherly love for one another.
• Fishing in a canoe with 9 people helping with the net; only to receive a handful of fish

Homecoming:

As I open my second to last letter from my family, there is a daily bread devotion for today, July 29th, titled Homecoming. How appropriate for me to be reading this devotion. The amount of excited that is going through my body is priceless. I am looking forward to going home and seeing my family. I realize every time I am apart from my family for a long period of time how much they mean to me. I take them for granted sometimes. I have learned that I need to give more patience to my family; to treat them as if they are not related in accordance to speaking to them with respect and not demean them. It is so great to have such a close relationship with someone that they know what you feel just by seeing your demeanor, or they know what you will say in response. That is priceless. What makes me even more speechless is the relationship that we can have with God. It is never ending. You can’t reach a dead end. God is so deep and intimate with us that we can spend our entire lifetime here on earth searching to know Him better but to know God entirely requires us to have a commitment with Him so that we may spend eternity getting to know how amazing He really Is. That to me is astonishing because the humility that I feel in his presence now, with the knowledge that I have now of Him, seems to take over my life. I want to kneel before Him on judgment day and hear His words of “Well done, Good and Faithful Servant”. That will be the ultimate homecoming. I can imagine how much my family desires to see me, yearns for my attention, and cant wait to have me in their arms; given that I can only imagine how God feels to have me in His kingdom, to spend every moment of my time to worship Him.

Leaving Cotonou, Benin

My bags are packed, my forms are signed, passport in hand, and a warm goodbye. As I packed for the trip home, a bitter sweet feeling rose up in my heart. I have made a few friends/acquaintances that I truly enjoyed getting to know… but their are two friends that will remain friends for hopefully a lifetime. These two girls influenced my life while in Cotonou. Their love for the Lord and their beautiful joyful spirit is contagious. As they both hand me goodbye-for-now letters there is a special place in my heart for them. They are giving and selfless. The love that I felt when leaving was encouraging. I have memories with each one. From the Left in the picture: Hannah, my san Fran girl, who was so open and willing to share who she is and get to know me better. Sarah Oliver, From England, my craft market excursion partner. She and I walked all over Benin trying to find this market, come to find out that we were parading around it like a Carousel. Shauna, From Ohio, who is such a fun person to be around and she has a great taste in music (country girl). Deb, my Australian Mate, who has a contagious laugh and joy for life that I hope to catch. Miriam, who is so sweet and giving, she is attentive and caring. All these girls I learned something from. Memories of intimate talks on deck 8, to games in mid-ships, watching the dive team, experiencing the African life in town; from excursions to markets, to restaurants, and to beaches and riding little tricycles and taking fun photos on my last evening aboard. These are the things that I will miss.

Sittin on a swing!

While sitting on the swing on deck 7 this morning and reading, Romans chapter 5 came to mind. I started reading it in complete solitude:

"Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."

This passage speaks for itself. It spoke to me so clearly that I thought that a light was turned on. I know that in the past I have persevered and that i have gained character and hope through it but i have experienced a greater hope and faith in the Lord by spending time with him. I have had a great "vacation-growth time" with the Lord. I look forward to going back to my life and my reality and being different. A better person I hope, I feel different. I feel at peace with my life. With my nursing school, where ever and whenever that may be; with my future and relationship that will come along. I know that God has me in the palm of his hand and that, that is what I have faith in. That God has my life planned out and He knows what I need, when I need it, and how I need it. He opens my eyes to things that have been there for years, seeing it in a different light or from a different perspective and yet along the way has been preparing me for this day my entire life so far.

My last Few Days of Work on the Africa Mercy

Well i only have two more days of work left in the Galley on the Africa Mercy. I havent been spending very much time blogging because I have been trying to stay afloat with being here and not on the internet. I have been blessed with so many people so many situations that my heart is on overload. I work with Paige, the girl in the picture, and she is such a great fun, out going girl. I have truly enjoyed the time that I have gotten singing worship songs while cutting cucumbers or peeling carrots for 400 hundred people. I have found that worship is the ultimate gift of staying in close relationship with the Lord. I am encouraged on so many levels when i can sing my little heart out to a song that humbles me in the Lords presence. When just one song make my entire day a different approach to living it, or a brighter one just because my heart is in the right place. Its amazing how if you take the time in the morning to have the right priority your life changes for the better not only for that day but you also have that right mind set for life. Spending the time with the Lord is more important and much more rewarding than watching a movie or spending your time some other way... being still before the Lord is breathtaking. As i sat up on the top deck the other morning I was in awe of who God is once again. I hope that i will continue to have that feeling and that mind set for the rest of my life. I desire for the Lord to continue to put me on my knees, humble myself before him. I have a bitter sweet feeling of leaving the ship. I look forward to continuing my growth in another part of the world.

A Blessing!

As I sit up on Deck 8 with two amazing women... I am blessed with their presence. These women love the Lord, Have a passion to serve people (nurses on the ship) and to serve the Lord and their hearts reflect that of love and joy. A blessing it was to spend time on deck 8 and to hear a testimony of how Deb's life touched so many just through her desire to follow Jesus attentively. She shared her story with me one of such physical pain and emotional growth. She shouldn't be alive from the great heights that she had fallen and the amount of bones that she broke... her life is a blessing because of the Lord's Mercy and Hand in her life. As I listen to her I see the intimacy that she desires and that she has with the Lord. She speaks of Him with reverence and with love. Her life is a living example of how amazing God is and how if you give your ENTIRE life to Him, he will bless you in more ways that one. I know that the pain that she endured, the growth that she went through and the patience that she had during her accident; has, is and will be used to glorify God in more ways than one. Her joyful spirit and passion for life is contagious. It just goes to show you that if you trust in the Lord with all your heart you can get through anything. It is only through a miracle that Deb is sitting next to me telling me about her story. Her persistence to follow Jesus and be different changed her life completely... and whats more beautiful is that she was trusting the Lord through anything. She is an encouragement to me and I appreciate her life and the blessing of her story.

Holding Hearts in the Palm of Our Hands

Just because you are a Christian doesn’t mean that you all of a sudden have a key to how to deal with every situation. I mean how great would that be... a program that you can say "Ok here’s the situation.. now tell me what to do." We don’t know how to go about certain things. I mean God didn’t write out what you should do in every situation. So I ask myself “How do I go about those difficult situations?” Well a thought has been placed in my mind, if we love our neighbors as ourselves. If we treat them with the love that Christ has for us… then that must be the answer. We have to pray and be in union with the Lord within every moment that we have. If God doesn’t keep track of time and his timing is different then ours then who are we to say yeah I think that its time to stop trying to love my friend or love my co-worker. Do you truly love those around us like Jesus loved… No, we don’t always love those around us, we are totally wired to be focused on ourselves. We need to know that those that we love or show love to are the only people that we have. We hold peoples hearts in our hands... be careful with them by showing love in every situation.

Trusting completely? Really?

So a close friend of mine brought up a topic that sparked a thought and made me want to search my heart.... If we worry and are fearful about what lies ahead then are we trusting God? Are we giving Him our lives completely? Our lives now a days are so fast paced and so driven by stress. Today in our community meeting someone shared a different perspective to the english term... A.S.A.P. When we see this we think.. as soon as possible, hurry-hurry, be stressed out of your mind to get the task done. Well in relativity to a new state of mind.. A.S.A.P. should mean... always say a prayer. I mean if you think about it, that is exactly where our mind set needs to be when we are stressed or rushed to do something. To "always say a prayer" means that you are inviting God to be included on what is happening in your life. You are setting your heart on what God wants for your life not tackling it all on your own. You are trusting.... when you pray about it, the worry or stress should be given all to the Lord. I am talking to myself here. I mean seriously I have to remind myself everyday that I need to get my mind set right. I find that if my heart is focused on God at the start of my day, it is hard to worry about the little things. SO I ask myself... am I fearful of what the world may challenge me or am I fearful of the Lord?

Sound that Brings me to tears!

As the hammer hits against the strings of a grand piano, the vibrations resonate in my ears. I am amazed how such a beautiful sound can make me so tender to the voice of God. God is so beautiful, so amazing, I am in awe of his creation of feelings, touch, sound, the human body, His presence. I am full of life and want to love on those around me. I want to shout on the mountain tops how much I am in Love with GOD! How his presence makes me fall to my knees, How his comfort is all that I need, How I just want to sing praises to Him every moment! that is how I feel this morning. As the piano continues to play my heart is warmed. I feel like its the perfect sound to be humbled in Jesus' presence.

A trip to the Capital of Benin: Porto-Novo

On Saturday morning I was invited to go along with 7 other girls and two fellas to drive to the capital city. I was really excited to go since it is the last free Saturday that I have in Africa for this trip. We loaded up into a land rover and drove 30 minutes, chatting along the way. When we arrived into town we stopped at the local street markets and walked around a bit to stretch our legs. We found this Voodo place that was selling some interesting dead animals. The smell was beyond rancid, it was so bad that it gave me a stomach ache. We then got into the car and drove around to find a new stadium that had just been opened up to the public about a hour an hour before. We got out and followed the crowd into the stadium. As we were walking a helicopter was flying overhead and everyone started to get so excited. The stadium was beautiful.... the grass was so green and the structure was like something back at home. When we got to the other side of the stadium... we found out that the President of Benin had flown in to give the opening of the stadium an initiation. The crowd was so overjoyed and intent on meeting the president. The stadium had vendors... but their vendors were walking around with their product in containers on their heads. They had doughnuts, cinnamon rolls, Ice cream (Fan Milk- the vanilla is my favorite), they had bread and drinks, and they had pineapple. I have never seen someone skin a pineapple so fast. The woman would sharpen her knife in front of you then skin it right in front of your eyes within a minute.... all in one spiral piece. I was impressed.
As the futbol game started the crowd filtered in and started to cheer. The team was a younger league but their skill level was amazing. We watched the game a bit then headed to a another market to walk around. There really wasn't much to do in Porto-Novo but I am glad that I went. I had a great experience. Beth, a nurse from Australia, is in the picture with me at the stadium.

My Team in the Galley

My boss took my team out to dinner Friday night to O'Grill. In the picture we have from the Back Left: Andrien, Sam, Jesse, Luke, Arethra, Me, then Paige and Lorenda. We had such a great time sitting together outside on the patio of the restaurant. We laughed and had such a great time making fun of each other and sharing special moments in the galley. Like when Sam threw a large melon into a sink of water right in front of me and got me soaked! Its an initiation of new galley crew members but it was fun! Those are the type of things that I will remember. Like how slippy the floor is and how you can dance so much better in the galley then on any other floor... especially doing the mashed potato dance move. We blast the music and sing, dance, we shared testimonies over peeling carrots, and laughed at music selections on each persons ipod; those are the memories that I will remember.

CHildren Of God

The Children of Africa make the experience real and difficult. They yell "White Person White Person, hello, Good morning and afternoon, thank you" in French as we walk by them. They dance around because they are so excited to see us. Although some children are scared of us because they have never seen a white person before. They stare at you until you look at them, they want your attention and you to smile. They wave with such intensity and joy. Their lives are harder than any I have seen before and yet they are still joyful and full of life. The children are different here, they work at such a young age that it makes them understand how hard life is. Their childhood is different than what I am accustomed to. I mean when is the last time you saw a little girl oh about 7 years of age, carrying a bucket full of fruit in a "farmers market" setting. She was working at the age of 7, or a little girl who was preparing some herbs with her grandmother to sell on the side of the road.
The excitement as we drive by or the children running after our car makes me full of joy and warmth. Just look at these beautiful children that I got a few snap shots of... they are beautiful beyond belief.

Eviceration Surgery

This blog might be a bit much for my squeamish ones. Caution blood is mentioned a few times. In the locker room I put on the blue scrubs provided for me to wear during my viewing. As I look in the mirror my heart is excited to know when I will actually get to put on this attire everyday for my career. I slip into the little booty coverings for my shoes, put on the hat and with my camera in hand walk into the operating room. As I walk in there are four patience in the chairs. the room is warmer than a typical surgical room, the smell is a different smell and all the medical staff greet me with a smile or a common "who just came in" glance. I stand in a place that I can see all four Tv's that are showing the surgeries that are occuring at that time. Cataracts are the focus of this operating room. I choose to watch this one doctor for he was teaching a local surgeon how to do this special advanced procedure. He seemed to be the teaching type: calm, well spoken, knowledgeable, patient. His name Is Glenn. As I watched the first surgery I got a little hot and a bit anxious because i haven't seen s surgery in quite some time. I distract myself a bit as I glance over the chart on the wall with the structure of the eye. After my core temperature and blood pressure went back to somewhat normal I finished watching the remaining of the surgery.
Glenn then invited me to come watch his next surgery which was an Evisceration surgery. An Evisceration surgery is the removal of the inner parts of the eye. In this patients situation, she had some trauma to one of her eyes and has been blind (in her right eye only) ever since. Glenn asked me if I have ever seen a surgery as bloody as this one before and i said only on TV. I was never once grossed out, I was fascinated the entire time I was there. He began the surgery and I was amazed. He removed the cornea and there was a black mass in her eye. Glenn had never seen such a thing before and removed it to find that it was an encapsulated calcified mass. Glenn said because of the trauma its most likely that their was something in her eye and since it was foreign to her body, her body took defense and protected itself. I wanted to dissect this thing... I took a picture of it which one of the pictures but I edited out the bloody stuff for my squeamish viewers. Glenn then sewed up the eye after inserting a glass ball to give the eye shape, and then gave her a prosthetic eye that she can remove and insert herself. I was so excited to get to be apart of one of the most interesting surgeries on the ship and get to experience the blessing that Mercy ships is taking a part in. These patients are being blessed beyond what they ever expected.

Experiencing Beauty for the First Time in Years...

This morning I attended the VVF Ceremonies for three African Women who have successfully recovered from surgery. Their surgery was more than what it sounds it was a surgery that changes their lives in more ways than one. These women after the birth of a child had lost their control over their bladder, causing them to leak and a social out cast. Their entire lives were damaged because they didn't have the financial means to get to the doctor and get help. On the ship after each of these women recover and can function normally mercy ships holds a ceremony in their honor.
As I walk down the Hall to the Ward Joy/C I hear angels singing praise and adoration of such blessing on their lives. It is beautiful and brings joy to my heart and tears to my eyes. I cant imagine what joy they must feel to be able to return to work, be able to be socially excepted by their friends and family, and to live life with control over their own bodies. The women get a beautiful dress that is made just for them to signify a clean start. A mirror to look at themselves and tell themselves that they are fearfully and wonderfully made by God. A bar of soap to clean up with and a bottle of lotion to pamper themselves after their bath and smell nice. Their hearts are beautiful.... they gave their testimonies and then they danced and sang together. They danced like David danced, only for the honor and glory of God in praise. I was so touched by this event and the special part of their lives that will never be the same. Their past will no longer be the anchor of their future.

Beauty in a Hard Place!

May times during a hard time in my life i get the feeling that is too overwhelming to deal with. The feeling that makes life so difficult that you question your faith. This feeling I am grateful for. As many of you know what my family went through in 2008- this situation made me have this overwhelming feeling. I had no control of what was ahead, i did not know the outcome of the situation. But what I did know was that God was in control. I knew that from Romans 8:28 "And we know that God causes all things to work together for the good to those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose." My mother was called to have the faith that she had so that she could trust in the Lord through the hardest time of her life. Not to mention she was the backbone for me in my growth with the Lord during this time. She encouraged me more than I could ever have imagined. She was up lifting, her heart was full of joy, she cried and wept as she "sat" in Jesus' presence, she was fearful of the Lord and it was evident. I am not the same woman I was last year prior to my mother's situation. God has stretched me so much and prepared my heart for so many things that it is encouraging to know that God knows what lies ahead. He has prepared me to come to Africa and trust in Him in all situations. It is during the hard times that my heart yearns to cling to God's heart and to His truths but I am challenged to cling to Him in all times easy or hard. Clinging to the Lord during the hard times is a choice- A choice that can change your life entirely. I pray that my heart never loses the Love that I have for God... that I continue to fall in love with Him everyday. The growth during the hard times has you more focused and more dependent on Him in the end and that makes you a stronger person.

Four Squares Church

Four Squares Church is a local church that was held in a government building this morning. I joined a group of crew members and drove to the morning service. We had to have a translator because the service was in French, so Christian who works on the ship on the deck came with us. I have the same feeling that I did when I came back from church in Fiji. I am amazed by the expression of the locals love for Jesus. They sing and dance around the church, saying AMEN and Hallelujah as the preacher is teaching the good word. The music was beautiful, just cries of their heart in an orderly fashion. Singing praises and worship then going into the state of adoration. They spent about twenty minutes just at the beginning of the service to pray: not pray for themselves but to lift God's name up and to praise Him for the many blessings we have. I found my heart in complete humility before the Lord. I know that I am so blessed but my knowledge has increased in more than ample amounts on my status in life. I have no worries, no stresses, no deathly diseases, no hunger, no pain, and yet I still have those days that I am human and complain about something. I want to count my blessings and bless others with them. I have had a mission statement for my life for a little while now: "Bless others because I am blessed." Am I blessing others? Am I striving to be like Christ everyday? These are just questions to keep me on track, some days I cant answer them, those days should not exist. I want to strive after the heart of Jesus. After the compassion that Jesus had for each individual- that is a challenge and a goal. The picture is of a little girl whose was sitting outside of the church on the way out.

Jardin d'Eden Orphanage: Cotonou, Benin

Today the ship’s engine needed to be cleaned so that our air conditioning and filtering systems would work correctly. Well to do so means that the engines need to be turned off… our electrical system, plumbing, and anything that needs power was unable to work for at least 8 hours of the day. The ship is quiet, dark, kinda reminds me of the titanic when they are trying to escape… but we are totally fine. So as a result of this planned black out day0 many people signed up to go do something… I decided to go to the Orphanage. A group from the ship goes every week as routine. We got to the orphanage and the children flocked to greet us. We were greeted with love and absolute joy. One little girl grabbed my attention and decided to not let me go. She was so sweet. She was flirtatious with her eye contact…wanted me to hold her and love on her. After I smiled a big grin she walked over and jumped on my lap. She started investigating what I was wearing…. My necklace, my rings, the print on my skirt and the freckles on my arms. She was so precious and was yearning for attention. I found myself also desiring to be hugged. I think that being on this ship and not having the people who normally give you hugs and personal contact not present but thousands of miles away is hard for me. I contemplated the necessity for love and physical contact just in an everyday manner. I need it that’s for sure. She hugged me as much as she could as long as I would let her. She loved the way my skirt swished as I danced with her around the room. She would grab the sides of the bottom of my skirt and re-enact my motions. We sang songs as a group… some in French and some in English. But I always knew when Jesus and amen were proclaimed… amen to that huh! I was a part of the play to act out the story of the parable and the sower with the seed. The children understood it well and the interpreter said that they wanted us to do another. We did a few crafts and played some games with them all and then had to go for the children’s day needed to proceed as scheduled. We couldn't take pictures of the children just out of respect for them and to have the right approach to wanting to be there to serve not be snapping photos. I was bummed because I would have loved to take a picture of the little girl with me. I really enjoyed my experience.

Utimate Frizbee in Africa!

Every Friday afternoon- Ultimate Frisbee is played in Cotonou, Benin at the police dept field. There are a variety of different nationalities, different languages, different skin tones, different levels of skill and different outlooks on life but there is one thing that remains a constant- Jesus Christ as our bond.

The first Friday I was here I went and played. I had such a great time connecting with other crew mates in a recreational manner. I had a blast running around on the field exerting some energy and creating memories that will never leave me. I cant believe that I am half way around the world and can say that I am going to play Ultimate Frisbee. I- being the newbie that I was last week- brought my camera to take pictures of my experience. The first picture is of Paige, Myself and Claire on our way to play, the second is our playing field, and the last one is driving home on the busy streets of Cotonou, Benin.

Be Courageous: Ask for Help!

Every Thursday evening we have community meeting on the Africa Mercy Ship. This is when all of the staff join together to worship and have church basically. We had amazing worship. I was touched by the songs chosen to be played. Last nights speaker was the wife of the Chaplin on the ship, Diana. I was encouraged by her words. Help was her topic of choice but not that we would give help to those around us because we are all helping already... Mercy SHips is filled with helpers. She encouraged us to be the helpee. You know ask for Help. She then Identified how to go about the things that we are struggling to ask for help with. We have two people that are there to help us...God and our community. We have two situations that we need to ask for help with: when something is too overwhelming or too big for us to handle and when we think that we can handle that which is laid before us.
My heart was knocked upon...there isnt one huge area that I need help in but the little areas are where I find myself having too many of. I think that I can carry the small things, but I find very soon that the small things add up. A vision comes to mind for me... So you have this table of a bunch of small cans of food. Yes you can pick up one at a time and the load isnt too much, picking up two or three isnt a struggle either. So we think why cant we pick up some more... so we pick up some more not putting down or asking for help with any of them. The load becomes then too much to carry on your own, your PRIDE comes into play telling yourself that

YOU CAN DO IT! YOU DON'T NEED HELP!

your mindset is set that if you ask for help it is seen as a failure. God tells us in the Bible "himself that "I will never leave you nor forsake you"; so that we confidently can say. "The Lord is my helper, I will not be afraid."" Hebrews 13:5,6 Do you believe that God is your Helper? I had to ask myself this. And if I believe this then why am I picking up so many cans and adding such a heavy burden to my life when God is right there to help me. Right there to support me when I need to carry a can or two when its time to grow, and it still doesn't hurt to ask for help to get through those growth times. God wants us to trust in him in every situation. Be courageous: ask for help. Start with smaller things and lead up to the more difficult and challenging things.

Rest

psalms 23 came to me this afternoon as i woke up from my afternoon nap. During the weekdays I have two breaks furing the day from work and they are about an hour long so I take that time to sleep and get rejuvenated. I only slept for a short time today and woke up with psalm 23 on my mind. I am so grateful for My Christian School upbringing to have memorized the first couple of verses of psalm 23. "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside still waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for His name sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me, your rod and your staff they comfort me." These verses are like warm blankets fresh out of the dryer, they warm me up to the bone and surround me with themselves. I started thinking about how the Lord is my shepherd and what it means to not want any other leader but Him. Only wanting Him to show me the way, not myself. I have heard the phrase or comparision of us to lambs or sheep. I am truly a lamb, a baby lamb at that. I have no idea where the shepherd is leading us and I am influenced by those who are wiser that me and more experienced. I have an exuberance for life and want to live it to the fullest everyday and I want to make sure that I am playing within the field that my shepherd has laid out for me. I do not want to stray from his plan, do not want to wander away from His teachings. I am learning that whatever comes of these next few weeks is what God has in store for me. I have applied to a nursing school in Nevada, Touro University, and my parents will receive a letter soon with the results of my application. I find myself thinking about getting into the school and what joy and excitement I will have to know that all of my hard work and all that my heart desires will finally pay off and come true. I also find myself knowing what disappointing feelings I will feel if I dont get in.... but then I remind myself that God has me in his hands. If this school is not for me and not where I need to be then I do not want to be there. I do not want to be out of what the Lord has for me. There have been times in my life just recently in the past year that God has had to pick me up and carry me because my heart was growing so much for him that I was having a hard time being around others. What I didn't know was that He was preparing me to overcome a hill that my family had to climb over last year. He picked me up at the bottom of the hill and carried me until He thought I could stand on my own feet. God si so amazing and his heart adn love for me and others is " " there is no word that can define it in my vocabulary right now. It is like standing at the sight of a huge mountain and being in awe of it... speechless. I am so grateful and so encouraged to know that I can rest in Him everyday and trust that he will lead me into green pastures- a peaceful and beautiful place. Find Him today, rest in the truth that "God knows all, Loves all and will protect all of those who love and worship Him."

Fabric Market

A group of my new friends and I went to the fabric market Tuesday afternoon. The weather was beautiful. The humidity wasn't too bad, not too thick. The sun was hidden by the rain clouds and the day was perfect for an adventure. We walked about 30-35 minutes to this street in the center of town to find fabric to make clothing back at the ship. The journey there I was looking at all the colorful outfits that the Beninese were wearing and which types of fabrics I liked. There are so many different kinds. Vividly colorful, subtle, busy print, large print, small print. When we got to the street my mind was overwhelmed. There must have been 40-50 shops of just fabric. Each different but similar. They all had a few of them displayed in front of their shop hanging from the awnings. The street was busy with zoombies and cars and children rummaging through the streets. I finally found one fabric pattern that stood out to me over all the rest. I wanted something that is cultural but something that I could wear back at home, something to remember my trip by. We have a seamstress that come to the ship and makes clothing for us. I will use my fabric to make a skirt and possibly something else depending upon how much I have left.

Children in the Ward

Yesterday morning I had the pleasure of playing with the children in the A ward who were scheduled for surgery yesterday. They were having eye surgery later that day and had just had their baths before I got there to prepare them for surgery. The children are so precious and so joyful at heart. You can see that sitting with them and playing with them changes their spirit. Something so simple and priceless as your time can make someones day. Balloons are scattered oh so gently around the room as the children pick them up and throw them in the air. The balloon seems as though it has a few similar characteristics of these children. They are not thick skinned so it only takes a little attention to see their heart and feel their love for you. They are willing to do anything as long as they are playing with you, giving them your attention.
One little girl was a sibling of a patient and she was so precious. Her hair so tightly curled to her head, her little feet running around the room making noise on the floor, and her smile and excitement that fills the room. We are children of God. A children song came to mind "Red and yellow, black, and White they are precious in his sight Jesus loves the little children of the World." This encourages my heart. God loves every person given their sickness, weakness, personality, poverty level, outward appearance, and even the annoying habits of all of us. That makes me feel so loved and wanted. He loves us- Oh how he loves us! I am in awe of who God is. I am consumed by his character, his love and his mercy. Are you not allowing people to have an effect on your life because you are having thick skin? It is so easy to protect yourself from being vulnerable but God didn't intend us to be alone but in community.

Africa Mercy

For those of you who are very interested in seeing what my plush life is like on the ship I encourage you to visit this website http://www.ms-information.org/ and scroll down to the bottom of the page and click virtual tour. The tour will give you the best sites of the ship and where my everyday life is spent. It is not that long of a video but it will take a few minutes. I cant believe that I have almost been here a week. Check it out and I will blog again today of my experience with visiting the children in the ward. This picture is one of the views to the mainland from the ship. They are little boats that go out fishing during the day.

Persecution for beliefs:

I have not been persecuted for my beliefs just to start off and not to worry anyone. A group of us went into town today to get ice cream from one of the stores. On our way back to the ship an african man started talking to us in English about Mercy Ships: About what we are doing and how blessed he is to be witnessing such a great thing. This touched my heart and also made me really think. He told us his story about how he had travelled here from Nigeria and how he is staying in a little "mote", small little space in a street hotel like, i believe. He was telling us that this place is full of muslums and that when he was praying to jesus they hung him by his ankles to punish him for his beliefs. He showed us his ankles all beat up and scarred. This was eye opening. Yes He could have bene begging for money or just lieing to us to get our attention but it made me think about what it would be like if we were persecuted for our beliefs everyday. I mean this really shows you if your faith is true and if you really are following Christ with the right heart and for the right purpose. Ponder on that... I am thats for sure. I want to be able to say Yes I love Jesus- no matter what the circumstances. I hope that I can say that I feel that way because I truely do but it is something that is a conscience effort everyday that we need to make. Give each Day to God for it belongs to Him because without Him we wuoldn't have this day.

My First Day of Service

My first day of service on the Africa Mercy Ship, my god-given gift has truely become abundant in my life. I have always known that I love to serve but this is a confirmation. I truly like to wait on people. To serve them on hand and foot-or knees today (mopping floors). I am so grateful for the opportunity to be here. It is finally settling in that I am here. I am in Africa and I love it. I work in the cafeteria where everyone comes to eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner. We work a total of two days during the week and every other weekend... so that means since I am working the weekend, I only will work two days this week. The other days I will be volunteering on the ship and trying to get to go on mercy teams into the mainland. I can fully tell that my heart is made to be a nurse. Not only can I not wait to view a surgery- which I will do very soon- I want to be in closer contact with the people and their hearts. Yes I can pray for someone afar and by just seeing them but when you get to serve them and wait on them with your every being, now that, that is what I am passionate about. I love people and I look forward to knowing whether or not I get into the nursing Program I have applied to. I find out in less than two weeks if I am accepted -Lord Willing-. I am not nervous, just wanting to know. I know that God has me doing great things in my life and I am living some of them right now but I look forward for what is to come on many things in my life. :) Serving someone doesn't only require you to be selfless it really depends on the love that God gives you to show to those who you are serving. John 13:35 says "By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." That verse today gave me drive and gave me a desire to do my job here in Africa. God is Here! There are so many people doing great things here... So many people getting blessed: many of us crew members realizing that the people are blessing us more than we are blessing them. Love someone today. Give them your undivided attention and your time.

The African Streets

Today was the ships holiday. Because the majority of the crew members are from the united states we celebrated a holiday so no surgeries took place unless necessary and everyone basically was on leave. The ship was a bit empty in the afternoon. This morning I went on an adventure to say the least with a group of girls that have bene here for quite some time to the streets to look at some shops. I was indeed apprehensive just because I heard my mothers voice in my head... Is it safe? Are you wearing bug spray? all the great things a mother should say... so I got off the ship and walked a bit to the busy streets of Benin. I was not surprised of the poverty of the Beninese for I feel like I am in the slums of Mexico. I was in disbelief though and my heart was wrenching with sadness when I saw a young girl, very thin and sickly looking, grabbed a scrap of food from the ground and ate it very quickly. This made my heart sink. I started to cry and put myself in her position. If I had to worry about my food and spend my day searching for food that is a scrap of someone elses on the ground, now my life would be different. I cant even mentally go there. I am so blessed and God has continually shown protection and provided such a great life for me I just feel useless for those who I cant reach and help. My heart is growing and is yearning to show love to more people. Why aren't we sharing our food and helping those around us. Compassion is the only word that comes to my mind. To love those who are less fortunate as us and care for those who choose to live a harder life. The African streets are crazy. Zoombies are little motorcycles that race around and the traffic control is non-existent. My life has flashed before my eyes a few times just because of the craziness of other drivers. The street markets are just like those in mexico: with the pestering venders wanting to make money off the white tourists, and the streets smelling like urine and feces. Although there are no streets with traffic like these that I have ever seen.

Taking Risks

My devotion today was so approprite for this day. Taking risks was the title. As I read this devotional my heart is in agreement with every statement."All of us have quiet desires floating somewhere in the back of our minds to accomplish, things that we are passionate about." These passionate desires for me are in action: being a servant in Africa was one thing in my life that I wanted to do. My heart is full of energy and excitement. The love and joy that God has given me for these people and for those who are on the ships serving with me is tremendous. My heart feels as though it will burst because I am so overjoyed. Yes, I feel that I have and am taking a risk by being here and being here alone... but God reminded me this morning during my quiet time that I am not alone. I am never alone. Although I am so far from my family and friends, those who love me, I will never be far away from the One who loves me most. He will protect me, take me in His arms when I am fearful and hold me, Fill the void in my heart that only is meant for His love and compassion. He confirms this in Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." Now the question that resides in my mind and hopefully will be an encouragement for you as well- Am I taking the risk that is place on my heart or am I too fearful of the outcome? The only thing holding you back from risk-taking is yourself! The fear that resided in your heart or the jitters that occur are all normal but the best thing is that with God's help you can find the courage and the will power to fullfill those dreams and fullfill what God has in store for you and for those in your presence. Something dawned on me today... I am not the only one affected by my trip, my family and friends are affected, the people that I work with are being affected, and most of all the People that I am serving- those who God intented for me to witness to- are being affected. God is ultimately gaining the honor and glory because my heart was called and my typical life was put on hold to live a risk-taking life to the fullest. So no you dont have to go to Africa or any other country to take a risk, you can step out and witness to someone just by calling them and letting them know that you love them and are truly praying for them. Take a risk- search your heart to find what Risk God has placed on your heart. From Africa: I love you all who are reading this. I appreciate your prayers and your thoughts.