Update about my Heart Lately!

So I have been so consumed with school lately that I haven't had the chance to write on my blog. I have an exit exam for my nursing school and I have been anxious, overwhelmed, emotional, you name it and I probably have felt the type of worry. I have been aware that it is a waste of my time and it builds nothing to worry, so all week I have been trying to rid the feelings of really what describe "a lack of faith". I have been on my knees literally all week praying for peace and to give my anxiety up and over to Him. Well my exam got moved out for another week, which is a blessing cause I see this week as an opportunity to sort of re-live this past week which I have been worrying and actually live with faith and knowing full well my position. I went to church this morning and was filled with such humility and repentance. I have been trying to deal with the surface appearance of my anxiety rather then seeing the root of it. I have been mowing the weeds on my lawn rather then trying to kill the weeds/heart ache that lies at the root. I was doubting God. I was doubting His ability to help me pass this exam. I don't know what lies ahead with this exit exam and really I just need to sit back and do all that I can to trust in the Lord. God has the ultimate plan and I need to be aware daily of the purpose of my life. Yes this exit exam is important, yes I still need to apply myself and give all that I have to prepare for this exam, BUT NO I don't need to try and carry the burden and the future on my shoulders; cause God has it all in His hands. The illustration was used today in church of parables about how the king left his people with blessings and came back to see what they have done with them. I related this to my situation. God has placed me in this Nursing school, God has carried me through this program- no doubt; why do I think that God is going to change? I am the one who is changing. I want to use this blessing of being in nursing school to His ultimate benefit. So I am going to invest in what He has placed me in and know full well that what God has for me in the end will be for the better of His plan and purpose not for my plan. I was humbled in the presence of God today in church. It felt so good to take communion and remind myself of the sovereignty of God. With that said- Studying is where I am heading to. God is good!